Depressed so I close my eyes

But no sunlight there,

Deep breaths

Trying

To maximize the effect

Of the prozac and ativan,

But nobody knows

What it’s like,

Trying  to get out of a locked room

When the key is missing.

Mind , spinning like a projector

With the same old pictures,

Panic and sheer frustration

Knowing fine well,

Chemicals are in control

And my sobbing  soul

Is powerless.

If I can’t even conjure up sunlight

With eyes closed

Seeing God is quite impossible,

Makes me think

That I only believe

When I can.

I’ll be like this with withering black roses

In a cracked vase

On my sideboard,

Until the slimy petals drop

Until the chemicals determine

I’ve had enough,

And they take a rest

Until the next time.

Categories: Blog, Creative writing, Photography, Poetry, uncategorised

Tags: Ativan, Depression, Prozac, Roses