I have written a little memoir about living in Glasgow. Living in a home with alcoholics. And living as an alcoholic.
But It’s also about bullies. Alcoholics might understand what I’m talking about. Everyone knows what a bully is.
I hope this helps. It’s not nice. Doesn’t end well.
But if you get it I’ll be a happy man.
This is where I am going. To live. To exist. To walk away from Britain, the greatest country in History.
I
I really believe that the human
Race has no finishing line
But we all fall dead
At different points
Along this pointless course,
Or else we are taken
Off the track
To a track less run
Where we can live out our dreams
Away from uncivilized civilization.
This is how I described my first drink of Scotch. The biggest mistake I made in my life. It was my gateway into a path of self destructiveness that brought me close to death. But the story is about bullies. Alcohol is the biggest bully of them all.
The fire was so nice and warm. Dying out of course. A few embers poking through the ashes. I took a drink and poked the fire. Some sparks and little flames popped up. The red spots under the ashes were fading so I picked up a fire lighter and placed it on the coals. For a few seconds there was a strong smell of paraffin. Then pop. Blue flame casting shadows at the back of the fireplace and around the sitting room. Shapes dancing in silence with a beautiful warmth and strange excitement. I poured another drink and sat on the floor in front of the fire. Getting warmer. More comfortable. My worries dissipated. I liked the feeling. The absence of worry. And the blurry feeling in my head. I wanted to chase these shadows round and round the room as the excitement mounted. My mind was telling me everything’s all right now. You can do what you want. Anything. No restrictions. Nothing’s holding you back. Then I fell into a faultless sleep.
So I went into Kindle and downloaded this awesome masterpiece. Anyway. I noticed some spelling mistakes. Then one or two grammatical errors. At least. But then I realized at times I was forgetting I used a pen name. Methinks I’m going to have to edit this thing.
Sample of dialogue from my book.
Hi, Greg
Hi.
So when are you thinking of leaving?
Soon.
Aw Graham. You could stay longer surely
Maybe.
It’s up to you Greg.
Etc lol
I have written 70,000 words about my experience as a kid in Scotland being brought up by a fairly wealthy professional musician.
Both parents were alcoholics but I try to focus on the bullying at school I could not contend with because my parents were always in a state of intoxication. i.e. Steaming drunk as they say in Glasgow.
It’s my first attempt and I put it up on Kindle Unlimited which means you don’t have to pay for it. Or it’s $2.99 from Kindle. Well, I am Scottish.
The writing is either awful or not bad or pretty good but if some of you guys could give me feedback I would be so happy.
It was more a cathartic experience than anything but it really is a weird and painful journey. I hope people identify with some of what I’ve attempted to write. Love you all.
Wandering between two points
With no other exit plan
Wondering if I
Will ever see the light of day
Again
Even though
The sun is covering the earth
In sweet golden light
I am trapped between coordinates
I put in place myself
Over time.
I try to think
Of happiness,
As a concept
Encapsulated in its own image.
And laughingly believe
I’ll be happy,
Just by bringing to mind
The thought,
That thinking happy thoughts
Would then follow
Without effort
And all would be well.
But happy thoughts only
Materialize ,
Not by concentrated effort,
But by avoiding,
All these wicked
People From hell.
Image from Beliefnet.com
